Recently, very sad news reached me.
A man I had the opportunity to meet in person passed away. A man living with trigeminal neuralgia...
From his daughter's account, I know he returned to drinking alcohol.
When I heard this, my first thought was not judgment. It was rather a question: how much must he have been suffering to seek relief there.
From the perspective of neurobiology, we know today that alcohol can indeed briefly reduce neuropathic pain. In the brain, it enhances the GABAergic system — one of the main inhibitory systems that quiets excessive neuronal activity.
At the same time, it inhibits NMDA receptors involved in pain signal transmission and central sensitization, the hypersensitivity of the nervous system. Additionally, it stimulates the release of dopamine and endorphins, which momentarily reduce suffering and emotional tension.
That is why some patients intuitively discover that alcohol provides temporary relief.
The problem is that this relief is very short-lived and very deceptive.
The nervous system quickly responds with even GREATER HYPEREXCITABILITY, and over time the pain can return stronger than before.
The man I'm writing about had classical trigeminal neuralgia.
I remember our meeting as if it were yesterday. A warm autumn afternoon. We sat in a cozy café with cups of coffee and began talking about life with pain.
He was much older than me, retired, but his eyes held a genuine spark. That curiosity about life that immediately draws you in.
What was very characteristic was his behavior during our conversation.
Every few minutes, those typical pain "shots" would appear.
Sometimes they would ease for a longer stretch, but when they came — he would suddenly stop talking, quickly press his hand to his face, and rub the painful spot.
Watching him, I could see before my eyes all the descriptions of this disease I had ever read. That suddenness, that instinctive reaching for the pain site, that brief moment when a person is simply trying to survive.
We talked for a long time about pain.
I explained the differences between what he experienced — brief, electric discharges of pain — and my constant pain.
We also talked about the different mechanisms of these conditions, about how differently the nervous system can behave.
I told him something I tell many people with trigeminal neuralgia: that in such cases, a thorough neurological consultation is essential. That sometimes you have to go through your own difficult journey across many specialists before finding the right one. A physician who truly knows this disease, can select the right treatment, and sometimes — if needed — can offer surgical treatment, which in some patients can bring enormous relief.
But he also had his own plan.
He told me that when he rode his bicycle, the attacks came less often — so he rode a lot. He visited chiropractors because he was convinced his pain might stem from compression in the cervical spine.
When he spoke about it, everything sounded logical.
And at the same time, I knew that with neurological conditions, it's very rarely that simple. Sometimes you need one more test. One more physician. One more path to try — even when you feel you no longer have the strength.
At the end, I told him one more thing.
That in moments of doubt, he could reach out to me — if he needed to talk, needed advice, or just needed ordinary human support.
Sometimes all it takes is someone who understands.
But my phone never rang again.
Today, thinking about this, I feel immense sadness.
That is why I want to say one thing to everyone who is struggling with trigeminal nerve pain or another type of neuropathic pain:
Do not stay alone with this pain.
This disease can be one of the cruelest things a person can experience. But it becomes even more terrifying when accompanied by loneliness. When a person feels that no one understands their pain, that they constantly have to explain something that cannot be seen.
So seek help.
Seek physicians who are willing to listen.
Seek people who will understand.
Sometimes you have to knock on many doors before one opens.
But it is truly worth continuing to try. Because in illness, it is very easy to lose hope. And sometimes it is precisely hope and another human being that allow us to survive the hardest moments.
I didn't know this man's full life story. I don't know the events that shaped him or the burdens he carried throughout his life.
I met him only in that one moment — in a brief fragment of his life's journey.
One autumn afternoon, a conversation over coffee, and a few sentences about a pain that can shake a person's entire world.
And yet that brief moment was enough to remember a man with a spark in his eyes. That's why the thought that his life ended too soon is a difficult one. The kind that stays with you for a long time.
And it leaves one quiet reminder — that in the face of living with pain, we must not be silent.
Because behind every pain stands someone's story, someone's life, and someone's daily battle that needs to be spoken about loudly.
Natalia — since 2014 I've been living with trigeminal nerve pain. I write in plain language, based on reliable sources and personal experience. Read my story →
Frequently Asked Questions
What is trigeminal neuralgia?
Trigeminal neuralgia is a chronic facial pain condition. It manifests as sudden, severe, usually one-sided pain attacks — often described as an electric shock. A single attack typically lasts from a few seconds to about two minutes.
What is the difference between neuralgia and neuropathy?
In simple terms: neuralgia primarily involves paroxysmal pain along a nerve, usually without loss of sensation. Neuropathy involves nerve damage that more often causes constant pain along with numbness and sensory loss.
Do regular painkillers help with neuropathic pain?
Usually not. Neuropathic pain responds poorly to paracetamol or anti-inflammatory drugs. Instead, medications that act on nerves are used, such as anticonvulsants like carbamazepine.
Can trigeminal neuralgia be cured?
In many people, pain can be effectively controlled with medications or procedures, and MVD provides the most durable results in eligible patients. The course varies — with periods of remission and relapse. Decisions are made together with your doctor.
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